Cause you're in love with love....

Today was so much fun.
I hung out with Becky and Kimmi.
We went to the beach, the mall, Chili's, and other stuff.
I miss hanging out with them.
It used to be every day in the summer.
But, that was a few summers ago.
We went to hockey, and saw Ray, and his sister Jess.
She is so nice, and so is their mom.
Jess and their mom noticed my hair cut. :)
Most of the people I see every day didn't even notice.
B-E ....... D.
How scary!!!
I've realized something about myself also.
I don't ever believe that I've been in love except once.
I used to think I was three times.
But I'm thinking about it, and I believe that I wasn't.
I like someone caring about me,
and so I tell myself I am in love,
or that I like them, but in truth I don't.
I never really loved the guys that I thought I did except the first.
It takes a lot to fall in love, and I never believe that either,
but it does. It takes a whole lot.
I'm not sure if I'll ever get there again.





Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.....you're not in love with him.

So why don't I....

So tonight was probably one of the best in a while.

I saw Jayne finally, and Rae. Of course Melissa too.

We watched a movie, until it didn't finish,

talked, and played this game which was interesting.

These are the nights that means something,

and even something meant anything back then,

that was back then and this is now.

It's not fun to have people say sorry,

when you know it doesn't mean a thing anymore.

Keep your friends close, b/c they're really there,

and the ones that are just fake friends will go.

Be sweet and keep smiling. :)

.....make one more wrong turn tonight.

Cause she can't ever fall in love...

Basically my Christmas is everything I'd ask for. ;)
I wore my footy pajamas! I'm going to be so happy with life
until these don't fit me anymore haha.
I got a new straightener, jeans, leggings, Jonas book,
moccasins, money, socks, and I'm pretty sure that's it.
But, that's more than I wanted so I was happy.
I did get homework, which is whatever.
I am most likely going to NYC. :)
And everyone smiled and is happy in my house.
I have a lot to smile about, so I don't need someone.
Haircut soon, & oil change. Ha.
Very very Merry Christmas!




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.....cause this is who she is and this all she knows.

So we can make the most.....

One!
I'm biting my tongue
Two!
He's kissing on you
Three!
Oh, why can't you see?
One! Two! Three! Four!

I like music. :)
Merry Christmas!!




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.....the most of what we've got.

When we're this young.....

Can You Keep A Secret?
Your secret's safe
And no one has to know
I'm your getaway
And a little bit more than you can take
I can make
Everything feel so good
I could have sworn
We disappeared tonight
Come on and dance with me
Come on and dance with me, baby
And don't you know
I just appeared tonight?
You wanna dance with me
You wanna dance with me all night
Nobody there will ever see us
Don't talk, don't walk
Just the two of us
Dance with me
Dance with me
Come on and dance with me
Dance with me, baby

Vegas Skies
Keeping me hopeless 'til I wake tomorrow
And if tonight ever makes a difference
The way that I feel the way that I'll remember it
I'll take this down until the glass remains
Swallow the words that I was meant to say
It's a long drive back to Vegas skies
So why don't I make one more wrong turn tonight, so
Say goodnight our first goodbye
I've only got forever and forever is fine
Just take your time
We'll stop the clock together
And know that the timing was right
All of these guards they stand tall and defensive
Putting up walls around what was once innocent
It won't let me in, but I'm stronger than that
'Cause you stole my eyes and I've never looked back
Girl, last night I forgot to mention
The way that I feel, the way that I'll remember this
When we're this young, we have nothing to lose
We just the clock to beat and a hand to choose


These two songs just made my day even better.
And so did all day. :)
Not expecting anything is better than lost expectations.




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.....we have nothing to lose.

I got my feet on the ground....

So my days have been pretty amazing.
The School of Rock concert was awesome.
That was an fun and unexpected night with some things.
"maybe I was a little back too." -Unexpected, but good.
I loved the Christmas party at the McConnell household.
Joey, Kate, Luis, and I watched Almost Famous.
It felt like old times from last year.
I missed Luis, but hopefully he'll be around more.
Today we went caroling for Spirit Club,
and I was scared it'd be weird, but it was so much fun.
150 pints of blood. :) Haha. Our boys.
I went to lunch with Nannie too, and I loved it.
I'm going to court tomorrow, and Christmas shopping too.
I'm excited to buy presents for people, b/c that's all I wanted to do.
I knew it would be a good week when all three lights on Water Street
were green for me last night on my way home from Joe and Katie's.
Absolutely nothing will bring me down, go ahead and try it. :P




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.....but my head's in the clouds.

Spend all my time....

These are the people who keep me alive. <333
I'm done living in my past, looking toward the future & now.




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.....stuck in yesterday.

She'll be waiting all alone....

So, I watched Twilight again today, and it was soooo good!
I adore Edward, but he's just a character in a book.
I am normally the person who everyone goes to for advice.
People always need me, and for once it feels good to need someone.
The advice I got was perfect. It was exactly what I needed.
I was very thankful for this person, and always will be.
She's the greatest, and I don't tell her that enough.
We've been through it all, and
I'm happy to say she is my number one best friend,
and I've never been one to believe that you only
have one true best friend, but if I had to choose it'd be her.
Although I actually have three best friends
who I can tell absolutely anything to.

Sadly, people change, and so does the trust you had with that person,
but those are things we learn, and
I'll just keep my trust closer to me from now on.





Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.....please just say you'll come back.

One more year....

It's safe to say I'm a safe bet
Oh no, get your name off my lips
You're going back to the way you move
You only love when you want to

So get up, get up
No one's make you stay
Sing it with me girl
Oh, there's nothing you can't say
and you know

You've got it down, you've got it down
We've got you figured out
You give it up when the lights go out
You give it up when you move the way you do

Oh, no

Scream out to the city
So you can make a run for it
We're gonna get back to, back to
The way that we used to, used to

So cut to the chase
We're a mess to be made
You only love when you want to


This song plays over and over in my head.
Basically it's on repeat, with no chance of stopping.
And I'm fine with that, b/c there's nothing like the sound of music.




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.......and I'll be heading out on my own.

Call me crazy but I'm thinking to myself....

My Christmas List:

1. No homework over break.

2. Go to NYC with Joey and more.

3. See my family smile Christmas morning.

4. Make sure everyone around me has a good day.

5. Someone to smile about.

I know that you don't always get what you wish for,

and I thought I was ok with that,

but this time I'm not sure anymore.

I'm understanding, and a push over.

I get it, and for this one thing that won't change.

I wish it would. :/

Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
.......that I can't do this anymore.

It was Autumn when I met you....

Last night was so good.
I hung out with Melissa, and we walked around the mall.
We ran into Katie, Bobby, and Maggie.
After that we went to Chris Rockwell's show at Bagel and Bean.
I was not sure what to expect, but I was blown away.
I think that everyone should go and just listen to him.
B/c no one seems to listen to anything in life anymore.

So much hussel and bussel and
people wanting to just run around & be crazy.
It's good to be free and yourself,
but sometimes you need to care.
You need to listen to what is going on.
Not everything can be seen with a
glimpse while you're running by.




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
........just not quite sure when I lost you.

I had a dream last night we....

So I am absolutely dieing to go here:



But my mom said she won't feel safe me going there alone,
so she agreed to a road trip to here:



I'm extremely excited! Summer 2010!




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
........spend a summer on the west coast.

And we'll go spinning around the room....

I've strangely become addicted to Twilight.
I never thought I would, well no that's wrong, I knew I would.
I didn't like the first book in the beginning, but that changed.
I adore it so much, and Edward.
Girls say that no guy will ever compare to him, but I don't believe that.
Ever girl will find their "Edward" at one time or another,
and that they are just impatient or scared that they never will.
Good things take time.

I've also realized that I have no idea what I want to do in life.
I'd love to just be able to live at home my whole life,
have a minimum wage job, and just dance and
run around like I have no care in the world.
B/c at this moment in my life, I don't care.
Yes, school, but that's really all.
Christmas is coming, and I should be making a list,
but the only thing I truly wish for is money to be able to go out
and buy my friends and family presents.
Nothing else sounds appealing to me to receive or even ask for.

Actually, there is one thing I'd absolutely love.
Butter, and eggs. Strange right?
Well, I have ten bags of cookies and no butter or eggs to bake them with.

I'm happy right now in my life, and very anxious for the weekend.
I'm expecting nothing new. <3




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
........and dance with our hearts on fire.

And it's just my luck.....

It's so hard to go through life and need people to help you make decisions
b/c you don't feel as if you can make them on your own.
But what happens when the one time you feel you're doing what is right,
the people who always help you tell you they don't think it's right?
Most of the time it's safe to say that you need others,
and yet in this case I just want to be left alone.
I get hurt, then I get hurt. At least in the end I could say that I did what I felt was right
and made me happy at the time. I understand that these people are only trying to help me,
and they don't like to see me hurt or sad,
but I think I have to go this one alone and follow my heart and my gut.




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
........to end up getting stuck to everything you are.

Can't call it Christmas...

SUCK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
........without someone to smile about.

All of the things that I thought were so easy....

So we made a video tonight for a contest and it was so much fun.
I felt bad b/c Becky and Melissa had to switch taping, but it's all good.
I'm still just as confused as before.
It's not fair to open up how you feel and then the other person doesn't.
Oh well, nothing I can really do about it other than just try harder to have them talk.
I'm just lucky to have good friends and to be going to college soon.




Be sweet and keep smiling. :)
........just got harder and harder each day.